TB871: Conflict management and systems thinking
Note: this is a post reflecting on one of the modules of my MSc in Systems Thinking in Practice. You can see all of the related posts in this category.
The video below shows the ‘Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument’ (2024). Activity P4.20 of the module materials asks us to reflect on this model, which plots possible responses to conflict on two axes – assertiveness and cooperation (The Open University, 2020).
Although some people act otherwise, conflict is inevitable in life, and particularly when doing systems thinking work. It’s how we deal with it that matters.
The image below shows the same four quadrants as shown in the video, created by plotting assertiveness (integrity, control, self-reliance) against cooperation (a positive way to move beyond conflict).
The module materials explain the different aspects of this diagram in the following way (The Open University, 2020):
- Competing may give you a short-term advantage, but if the outcome is win–lose it may not do much for the emotional dynamics of future relationships.
- Accommodating can be precarious as you may find yourself on a track that you’re not really happy with and start to feel resentful.
- Avoiding doesn’t really tackle the situation at all, but it does conserve some energy.
- Compromising will help you to move on, but everyone has lost a little – which can be dispiriting.
- Collaborating can be a leap out of the conflict situation into a different space with new possibilities – but it needs imagination and some mutual trust. Also, those who choose not to collaborate may see you as selling out.
I find myself in conflict situations reasonably often, and reflect on what happened. I know what I should do, but doing it is another story. With people I really care about I try to collaborate and go for the win-win, other than with my wife I’m very rarely accommodating, I never think it’s a good idea to avoid conflict, and so I end up competing a lot.
As the overview from the module materials indicates, collaborating isn’t always an option, and I’m not a big fan of compromising (which isn’t always win-win). I guess I can be a bit of a prickly character (an “arse” as more than one person has described me) so it’s something I’m going to have to work on from a systems thinking practitioner point of view.
References
- The Open University (2020) ‘P4.3.3 Responding to conflict and pressure’, TB871 Block 4 People stream [Online]. Available at https://learn2.open.ac.uk/mod/oucontent/view.php?id=2261494§ion=4.3 (Accessed 26 July 2024).
- ‘Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument’ (2024) Wikipedia. Available at: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas%E2%80%93Kilmann_Conflict_Mode_Instrument (Accessed: 26 July 2024).
