Tag: lifehacks

How to be overwhelmingly positive (even when you don’t feel like it)

Posted on March 29, 2010 by Doug Belshaw

Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response. (Mildred Barthel)

I used to have this quotation up in my classroom – accompanied by the smiliest smiley you’ve ever seen! It, along with other quotations* would often prompt questions and discussion. A lot of students didn’t really understand what it meant until I explained it to them. Some adults too.

What it means is this: everyone has setbacks in their life. But it’s your reactions not your carefully-considered actions that show your character. I’m reminded of the story of the member of the congregation who followed the vicar around whilst nailing up banners in the church. “Why are you following me around?” enquired the vicar. “I want to hear what you say when you hit your thumb with the hammer,” replied the parishioner! :-p

So to be positive is a choice in life. Things are going to come your way that you could conceive of as being:

unfair
sad
depressing
demotivational
a setback
tiring

Which is why you need to lean into life. Expect setbacks, have strategies for dealing with them.

The second way to be overwhelmingly positive (even when you don’t feel like it) is to focus on the needs of others. Selflessness actually has a massive effect on your own wellbeing and happiness. Think about it: our needs are actually very few; we often confuse what we desire with what we need. There are those around us with very real needs.

There are people who are lonely with whom you could spend some time.

People in mourning whom you could comfort.

Those struggling to make ends meet who you could help in cash or kind.

The list goes on. Once you take that step outside yourself, you’ll find it much easier to be positive. After all, you have to be positive in order to have a positive effect on others!**

* Such as my absolute favourite: “He who stops being better stops being good” (Oliver Cromwell)

** Just as with all advice on this blog, this is something I don’t claim to be perfect at. But I know that I’m in a state of perpetual beta. I’m actively *trying* to get better at stuff like this… 😀

A Week of Divesting: an introduction

Posted on August 31, 2009 by Doug Belshaw

Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple, having a Zen moment at home in 1982

I can’t seem to find the exact clip I want online, but there’s an episode of the Simpsons where Homer eats a chilli pepper and hallucinates. He eats it at the Springfield fair where Otto has hippy-like booth encouraging people to “Simplify, man…”

It’s amusing because we’ve all come across the stereotype of the zealot who wants everyone else to live their lifestyle. They sing its praises and assume that as it’s a lifestyle they enjoy and value that it’s both more appropriate and morally superior to others. In the Simpsons clip it’s a lifestyle defined by the mantra ‘simplify.’ What I’m interested in this blog post – and, in fact, this week – is not merely the ambiguous call to simplify one’s lifestyle, although what I’m going to do could be seen to be a constituent part of that. I’m going to spend a week divesting.

The best definition of ‘divest’ that I’ve found comes from Wiktionary:

To strip, deprive or dispossess oneself of something (such as a right, passion, privilege or prejudice).

What prompted this?

I subscribe to a number of podcasts that I listen to whilst driving. One of these is a Radio 4 programme called Beyond Belief. I caught the end of it when it was broadcast live and then listened to the podcast on my way to the National Christian Football Festival the weekend before last. This particular programme was about poverty and whether or not, especially in this time of recession, it could be seen as a good thing. I was particularly struck by what the Jainist monk had to say.

As my wife will attest I have, at several times during our marriage, talked of ‘getting rid of everything’ as I felt it was weighing me down. The Jainist spoke about this directly, and mentioned a poem [find poem] about a prisoner locked in a cage. This prisoner pleaded to his captors now and again. However, his pleading was not to be released from the cage, but simply to have a newer and shinier one. The Jainist likened this to being in the thrall of collecting material objects and wealth.

After the programme, and unusually for me as I like my music, I spent the rest of the journey in silence, contemplating. I reflected upon my new job, my Dad being half-way across the world, and my wife’s accusative statement the other day that all my son sees me do is ‘go on the computer.’ I realised that there’s stuff getting in the way of that which is important. I need to get rid of that stuff.

Why are you telling me this?

It would, of course, be quite possible to ‘divest’ quietly and with only my immediate family knowing about it. After all, as Jesus said, we should not let our left hand know what our right hand is doing. Am I showing off or attempting to garner praise?

Not at all. There’s three reasons why I want to document my actions and the thoughts behind them:

Sharing what I’m thinking and what I’m up to comes naturally to me.
I’m human and therefore weak. I may not actually go through with it unless I’m accountable to someone or something.
Perhaps you or someone you know wants to do something similar. This may give you ideas or lend support.

This week, therefore, I’ll be writing blog posts focusing on the following:

The final blog post of the week will be my reflections on whether it’s all gone to plan!

Are you weird?

I expect some of you reading this will assume that I’ve had some kind of re-religious conversion, especially given the references above. That’s not the case. This is purely a secular decision to reclaim some mental and physical space.

Some might think that I’ve turned into a Luddite. Far from it! It’s hardly likely given my new official job title is ‘Director of E-Learning.’ There’s a difference between recognising the appropriate use of technology and being the equivalent of a dog chasing shiny cars.

Others may consider that this is simply a fancy way of saying I’ve got too much stuff in my house and it’s time for a clear-out. Actually, the opposite is true, actually. We’ve moved house recently to a larger property. Compared to others, our house looks quite spartan.

Conclusion

Have you gone through or thought about something similar to this? If so, I’d like to hear about your experiences. Again, I’d like to point out that I’m not doing this for the back-slapping or to be praised. It, like many things I do, is an experiment. I hope it pays off!

The 3 key elements of productivity.

Posted on May 27, 2009 by Doug Belshaw

Productivity is big business. After all, who wouldn’t pay good money to find out how to become faster and better at work and play? The less reputable books, blogs and podcasts available would lead you to believe that there is some kind of ‘dark art’ or ‘magic formula’ to becoming more productive.

That’s simply not true.

Productivity boils down to three very straightforward things:

Motivation
Efficiency
Choices

Let me explain…

1. Motivation

These three key elements to productivity are actually somewhat hierarchical. At the bottom of the hierarchy comes motivation. This can come from a variety of sources but all lead to a realisation that your day-to-day routine can be made faster, better and more interesting by making some changes.

Some of the best ways to get motivated that I’ve found are:

Getting up early
Reading something motivational (including the Bible)
Finding an audience (e.g. through blogging)
Holding yourself accountable to someone else
Having a goal in mind (e.g. spending more time with family, achieving a target amount of something)

2. Efficiency

Efficiency is doing things you already do, but faster and/or better. It’s like replacing You 1.0 with You 1.5.So instead of using a paper calendar you use an online calendar. You multitask. If there’s a way to use keyboard shortcuts in an application you use routinely, you seek them out and start using them.

Motivation must be present before time-savings and productivity boosts through efficiency can be found. It’s far too easy to maintain the status quo and do things in the same old tried-and-tested way. Efficiency involves experimentation and, as such, can be tiring as you are exercising your mental faculties more. This, of course, is good in the long run for mental development and memory retention.

3. Choices

Ultimately, though, being productive means making the correct choices, constantly improving workflows and having a decent feedback system. One of the best ways of doing this is by being part of a self-improvement community. Churc communities – at least the more evangelical ones – are naturally like this, but they can be found elsewhere.

Twitter and other social networks are good places to find motivated, enthusiastic people willing to share ideas and tips on becoming more productive. Some of the absolutely top tips, however, come from the comments sections of productivity blogs.

Here’s 5 productivity-related blogs you should definitely subscribe to:

What makes YOU more productive? 🙂

(Image credit: WAYWT? by Frederic della Faille @ Flickr)